"Desperately Seeking God"

Ok, so the title of this entry is a little corny I know, but it does have a purpose. It has been a long time since my last post. Believe me, I did not intend on spending this much time away. I started this blog in hope's of encouraging others in Christ. AND with the move pending, it helped answer many of the same questions I was getting from friends and family. I have prayed about every word that I have typed...praying that God would inspire me and give me the words to help others. That he would use my vulnerability, transparency and humor ultimately for his purposes. But what happens when the inspiration is not there?

Lately I have felt distant. Distant from the one thing that brought me so much comfort, joy and peace in the beginning of this move. What does one do when "quiet time's" or lack there of, become mundain and uninspiring? Why was I falling asleep during them or finding them to be such a chore? And how, even with the best intentions, could I let a whole day go by without uttering a single word to him? Not even a "thank you for giving me another day of life". I was ashamed and so disappointed in myself. What happened? I was on fire for the Lord...why did that fire just go out? So, I started to ponder this and came to this conclusion. We are human beings and we are born sinners. We put off what we should do today to tomorrow. We often don't want to do what is good for us....like exercise, spend less, eat less, clean more, get organized...whatever it is, you know what I mean. Having a meaningful "quiet time" with God is no different. These are all things that will better us though and spending time with God is the BEST thing we can do for ourselves. I guess what I am getting at is although I may not "feel like it" it isn't always about the feeling. Sometimes it's just about doing. God never said we would experience those mountain top highs daily, just because we are a Christian...on the contrary. However, he does command us to spend time investing in him whether we feel like it or not. And whether we feel like it or not our investment is one that is guaranteed to pay off. What a comfort that is!

This past week I have committed to spending time with God daily. And not just a prayer and a quick devotional but I started a Bible study. One that is causing me to sit down, THINK, read my Bible and LEARN. I have committed to memorizing verses too. One of the questions in my study was "what kind of women do you want to be 10 years from now?" Wow, that question hit me hard and it is ultimately what got me back on track. I want to be a women that knows her Bible, one that can find a verse in seconds because of years of study. I want to sit next to my neighbor who has just lost a loved one and be able to rattle off memorized verses of comfort. I want to be a women who is never ashamed of the gospel or sharing it with anyone. I want to be a women that God has used to bring others to himself. I want to be a women that other women want to be like BECAUSE of Christ in me. I want to be a women that care's less about what she has and more about what she has to give. I want to be a women who can look back on the 10 years prior and be able to say "look at how far WE have come Lord". Wow, wouldn't that be something. So, I will leave you with the same question..."what kind of women do you want to be 10 years from now?"

Oh, one more thing, that "mountain top", "on fire" feeling...it can come back if you are willing to make the investment!

Those In Need

I recently received my first "holiday" card. Every year the card comes with an inspiring letter and a picture of the family. This year the family included a paragraph of things they were thankful for.

This morning the news confirmed what we all knew to be true that yes, we are indeed in a recession. Things are grim for many families this year and I have a feeling that next year won't be any different. That is why more then ever, we need to keep our focus heavenward. "Things we are thankful for:" was how the paragraph started and there in the middle was "A job - that allows us to give to others and pay our bills too". AND they were also thankful for "not having too much or too little". Wow, to put giving to other in with paying your bills was just awe inspiring...wish I had thought of the two together. Then to go on to say that they were thankful for not having too much or too little. In a society where so much emphasis is placed on what one has...I found this line profound. I know that you do not know this family but let me tell you, you might wish you did. They are a loving, happy, peace filled people who above all else love the Lord. And that is why they are so content.

This holiday season as you ponder how or what to give as a tithe or just as a Christmas donation let me give you this..."Bring all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be food in My house, and try Me now in this" says the Lord, "If I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you such blessing that there will not be room enough to receive it". Yes, that's right..he says test me in this...give without reservation and see if I will not pour out so much blessing on you that you won't have room for it all. This is the complete opposite of how many of us are thinking at this time and this year. Yet God says his wisdom is foolishness to man, and to follow him is to go against the grain, and following him is the road less traveled. Makes sense then that despite our fears in letting go of our money it is best to do so AND we will blessed. I don't know about you but God has already blessed me so richly I'm certainly not going to pass up anymore! Ha. Be thankful for what you have, hopefully it's "not too much and not too little". But regardless remember that there are SO many less fortunate then you. And even though it makes "human" sense to hold on to our money in this "recession", it makes "eternal" sense to give it away.

The Gift Of Life

As I mentioned in entries past, when I first moved to Ionia I prayed that God would give me good friends...real friends. I also prayed that God would provide me with a Bible Study. I knew that of all the times I had needed him in my life, I would need him now more then ever. Well low and behold I met Sara and that lead to a play date, which then lead to an invite to her Bible Study. Not a surprise really, I had a good feeling that God would provide, especially pertaining to growth in my relationship with him. Ok, I am getting to my point. Sara (a name I am using for privacy purposes), I soon found out was not yet a Christian...she was definitely seeking and had many questions but she had not made that step of faith yet. Often in my life I have wondered how someone became a Christian. I grew up in a Christian home and I accepted Christ at a young age. But what about those who accepted Christ at the ripe old age of 30 something....how did that happen? I also used to pray that God would use me to bring someone to him. Goodness, I am not a good example I would think. I decided to stop beating myself up and remember that we all fall short and if that were not the case, then what did Christ die for?!

The first week I met with my 3 new friends I could tell it was a great fit. I really liked them...they were funny, and they genuinely seemed to want to deepen their relationship with Christ and their understanding of the truth...especially Sara. She had so many questions. Each week I found myself looking forward to hearing what concerns she had. Each week I found myself becoming more and more devoted to praying for her. I could see that she was so close to accepting Christ. It was beyond exciting! Finally for the first time in my life I got to walk the journey with someone. I could see God peeling away the layers of doubt. I could see him revealing himself to her week by week. I watched as she got to a point where there was no more arguing it. Last week, I did not want to go to Bible Study, I was tired and I had just gotten over the flu. Of course the devil did not want me to go...he knew it was going to be a HUGE night. Sara had a big thing happen in her life that week. Something where there was no doubt that someone else was in control. That was the night that she accepted Christ...and this was the night she shared the news with us! We all cried...I'm sure the guys that wait on us every week thought we were nuts. If you have accepted Christ then you know the joy...the exhilaration we felt for her. You know, just as I did at that moment, that Sara's life will NEVER be the same. You know that she now has a purpose so much bigger then her. You know that God will use her and even bring others to Himself through her. I have to admit that my tears at that moment were truly for Sara but as I drove home that night the tears then were for myself. How amazing that God blessed me with being able to see him work. My long awaited question had now been answered. I got to see first hand how God can take an ordinary person and give them an extraordinary new life in him! Praise God.

Side note...I know many people read this blog. So, if you are not a Christian or even if you are but you don't feel you have that growing relationship with Christ then email me. And if you don't feel comfortable with me then pick up your Bible and pray that God will reveal himself to you. Start reading the book of Luke (personal favorite...wonder why?!) If there is one thing I have learned over the past few weeks it's that God can change anyone...there is not a question that he can soften your heart if you really want him to!!

Excersing my Freedom of Speak

I need to defend myself and that is the sole purpose of writing this entry. I am tired of people thinking that if you are not up for a heated political debate then you simply do not know enough to debate. Not true! There are people out there like me, who are just not confrontational and the idea of getting into a debate with one's friend is not the least bit enticing. Unfortunately, I believe this election has brought out the worst in people. And I am not just pointing the finger at others I am pointing at myself too! Our country is in need right now. Our country NEEDS change, our country NEEDS to be protected, our country NEEDS to figure out what the heck is going with this war but more then anything our country NEEDS God! And voting in line with what the Bible teaches is how I am going to be voting. Personally I do not believe that either candidate is the ideal pick for the presidency. It's killing me not to state my opinion here on issue's that are important to me....foreign policy, the war, our future relationship with Israel, socialized medicine, and abortion to name a few. Again, though I am not confrontational and even more then that I do not like to hurt any one's feelings. But know that I DO know enough to debate and with family and people that I am comfortable with I enjoy talking politics. My mother taught us at a young age to always look at both sides of the coin. Sometimes it would infuriate me..."why don't you believe the truth"?! However, she knew exactly what she was doing. For it was the truth that she wanted me to get to by being the opposing force. Looking back I know she argued with me even when she felt the same way I did. This taught me empathy. It also taught me not to follow the crowd but examine both sides of the situation. So yes, I do know what I am talking about when I talk politics and yes, I do understand how both candidates feel on issue's that are important to me. The Bible says to be prepared to give an answer for what you believe. This political season is an example of just that. Proverbs 8:32 says "now therefore, listen to me, my children, for blessed are those who keep my ways".

Make New Friend But Keep The Old

The other day I was riding in the car with Luke and he started to share with me how he was missing his friends from our old neighborhood. That old "Brownie's" song popped into my head "make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold". It broke my heart that he had yet to meet friends in our new neighborhood. Don't get me wrong we have met some of the nicest kids but they are all older then Luke. I explained that I too was missing my friends. That song is so true isn't it?! I have started to make new friends here and I feel that, as funny as it sounds, Facebook was dropped into my lap at the right time. Because I have been able to reconnect with my old high school pom girls and my old sorority sisters that live here in the GR area. What I have come to realize is that people really don't change, which in my case is good. I have down right laughed out loud a number of times reading things people have written to me...lot's of old memories. Those who always had a great sense of humor still do. God is so good, I know I say this in almost every entry but he is and friendships are just another example of that.

Let me briefly tell you about some new friends and how God provided them. One morning I was doing my prayer time and I had prayed that God would help me find a Bible Study. I knew that I needed something soon. Later that day I was outside with the boys and my neighbor next door came out and asked me if I would like to come to their Bible Study! Ok, well that was a quick answer to prayer! But even better then her asking me was that I realized we had even more in common then I originally thought. Another time a neighbor had a welcome party for Neil and I...which was just so sweet. Anyway, I made a connection with someone....we planned a play date and she too invited me to a Bible Study. The only book I had pulled from my packed books was the one her Bible Study was doing! Crazy. No, not all my friends need to be Christians nor am I ignorant enough to believe they will be. My point is that it has been so neat to see God provide any friendship! Old friendships are like gold. The girlfriends that know me best are the one's that have known me for years. But that doesn't mean there is not room for new "silver" friends. I am so excited to get to know new people. And I know that some of my new friends will someday fall under the "Gold" friends. God created us to be social creators. He made us in his image and Christ was always surrounded by people. I know he will take care of me. If you just moved or are just feeling like maybe you need some new friends ask God for his help. He care's about every detail or our lives...even our friendships!

Three Fashion "Must have's"

Oh the fun of fashion! Every season I look forward to seeing what the new "must have" fashions are. Although it can sometimes be a difficult time (because I cannot afford everything I want) it usually is exciting! I know not everyone gets into it like I do but I love it, always have, probably always will. So, I decided to dedicate this entry to my passion for fashion....ha, I like that. I must state that I am not a fashionista, I love clothing and I try my darndest to put things together nicely but I am pretty thrifty which doesn't always get me the exact look I want. Which brings me to my point. This season I found there are a few "must have's" that are not expensive. I found that without spending a lot I got a lot of what is "in". So I decided to pass on my finds to you, my beloved readers. The 3 items I think are needed are as follows....flats, some bold jewelry, and belts.

Let's start with the flats. I purchased both a black patten leather pair (a couple years ago!) and a brown pair (this year). Flats really will go with anything from a pair of jeans, to khaki's to skirts. I found a great pair at JCPenny, of all places, and they are both casual and dressy at the same time. And if you don't already have some shorter pants I suggest going to a tailor, paying the $10 it costs to get a pair of your black pants and jeans hemmed.

Next, let's talk belts. Of course, the practical me chose both black and brown. I have however, seen some great animal print one's that would jazz up any outfit. The reason I think belt's are a must is because again they don't cost much and they are being worn over everything from blouses to sweaters. I like them right at my waist however, my friend said that she does not like that because they make her look short waisted. So for her a looser belt worn at the hips works best. Last week for church I paired a black pair of wide legged trousers (already had them) with my black flats, a red short sleeve sweater (had it) and a black belt with a gold buckle (JCPenny $12) over top. I also threw on a gold circle, larger type necklace, with matching earrings (Target for $10). My new friend Diana said "love the jewelry, is it from Loft". Tip: If you really want to save some money I found that they now have these reversible belts. Black on one side and brown on the other. These are great especially if you want a gold buckle and a silver...you only need to purchase two belts vs. four!

Onto jewelry...I have always struggled with picking out the right jewelry. My friends Megan and Bri are awesome at getting the right jewelry look and so is my sister-in-law Janelle. They all seem to have a knack for picking out "statement" pieces. I always thought "statement" pieces cost a lot, until recently. What you need to do is don't be too practical, be a little adventurous and risky and look for SALES. Great places for jewelry, often on sale are Parisan, Coldwater Creek (not a big fan of the clothes but awesome jewelry), Target and JCPenny. I happen to stumble upon a great sale at Parisan the other day. And I did it! I took the plunge and got a couple necklaces and matching earrings that I probably would not have picked out prior seasons. Total came to $42! No, these pieces will not go with everything I have. Who cares though? How often do you actually wear things that would require adventuresome jewelry...not often. And for that matter how often do you see the same people when you do?! So, I say go for it! I picked a colorful stone necklace that I plan to pair with a white button up shirt and a pair of jeans (both of which we probably all already have).

Make fashion fun this season. Pull out those short pant from seasons past. Put a belt over that cardigan. And take a risk with a cool necklace.

This was fun...I would love to hear from you. You can leave suggestions under the area of the blog that you write a comment. I am always looking for great deals or idea's, so please fill me in on some of your great finds! And I believe that everyone can see what you write so anyone who reads this can use your advice. I am thinking of making my "State Farm" corner into a "Best Buys" corner for adult and children's clothes, home decor, etc.

New Beginnings

Seeing as I have not blogged in a REALLY long time there is a lot to say and not a lot of time to write. The boys need me now more then ever. Didn't realize how much of a help Kennedy was! We are doing well adjusting to our new life though. Here's a quick run down....

Luke has already made a friend across the street who by the way, has a 14 year old sister who loves to babysit! He seems to enjoy our new church as well. He walks right into his classroom without hardly saying goodbye. He has already memorized a verse...I could not be more proud! Seeing as he is not doing preschool this year I have been working with him. He is so good about sitting down to work and he seems to pick things up pretty easy. Which is great for me seeing as I am new to this "teacher" role.

Jack is our little chatter box. He goes on and on, sounds like he is even asking us questions but we have no idea what he is saying. He is at that stage though where he understands what we are saying to him. I love this age. He is such a little lover and yet so playful. I will cherish this time with my boys and I am thankful for it. We have no distractions, just each other during the day. I know that will change as we meet people and our activities start up soon. I just don't want to take it for granted.

We start MOPS at Ada Bible church (our church) next week and I am going to a couple functions for the Ada MOMS Club to see if it is a good fit for us. These things will help get the boys the socialization they really need now AND it will be fun for me to finally join a MOMS Club. My friend Jamie Lynch has been very active in hers for years and I have always wanted to find a good one!

Neil and I are loving being here. I am not just saying that...contrary to how most people would feel leaving great neighbors, family and a treasure of a city, we are actually very happy. We love the laid back feel of this area, the beautiful "up north" setting, and the friendly people. But, the main reason we are so happy is because God made it SO clear this was HIS plan for us. I am going to go into detail..... as I reflect on all he has done for us I am simply in AWE. Some may chalk these things up to coincidence or luck....I however, do not.

Actually some things are a little personal so I will leave those pieces out although they played a key part in us knowing it was time to move. As most of you know we had planned to sell the house. Neil left for Ionia in March and we knew we needed to have it sold by the end of Aug. because that was when Kennedy started school and there was not any other reason for me to stay beyond that point. My plan was that I would live with my parents if the house sold early so that Kennedy could remain with me. God sure knew what he was doing...in the end the house did sell a month before Kennedy started school, I ended up having go stay with my parents for a couple weeks. That was enough time! It is not easy to bring two households together under the same roof and any longer then two weeks would not have worked. So as disappointed as I was at the time that the house hadn't sold earlier, it was God's provision that it sold when it did.

Next, we had posted the house on Craigs List hoping for a renter seeing as it was not selling, we were running out of time. The renter that we wanted turned us down...the second one wanted the house all we had to do was send the paper work over that morning. That same day the couple that ended up buying the house wanted to see it. I was hesitant but something told me to let them see it anyway. It was always such a burden to get it ready to show especially with two kids! God sent Kristin and Adam at EXACTLY the right time. The women who was supposed to rent the house took the news very well and actually found another place in Plymouth to rent. Kristin and Adam wanted to be in the house by Sept. 1st and that was when we wanted to be out. The next issue though was could we get to the bank on time. Usually it takes a while to close however, God provided the last possible date of the month for us to close on! In regard to our place here....well Neil had told a guy from his Rotary Club that we would rent his house...without even seeing it. I'm sure he thought it would be just fine...it wasn't. I came up for Gary's Retirement party (agent Neil took over for) one weekend and we went to take a look...not good. So off to the retirement party we went. Keep in mind Neil was living with Gary at this time (another awesome blessing) but it was time for him to go seeing as Gary was no longer running the office. It was now Sat. evening and we had no place for Neil to live. At the party we ran into one of Gary's kids who happened to mention that his buddy had a condo that he needed to rent soon. Scott called Andy (landlord) and asked if we could see it right then. Guess what?? Went to see it and it was perfect for us. Even down to the colors it was painted...who says God doesn't care about the littlest of details in our lives! He sure does and he delights is blessing us as the Bible says.

As I am looking at how long this post is getting I feel that I should stop. There really is SO much more. I write this because I want you to be encouraged and know that God care's about every detail of our lives. He just wants us to put things in his hands. I really tried to do that through this entire process from the time Neil said he was interested in the Ionia office. I wanted so badly to see God work...it can be so easy to miss. But, he answered prayer after prayer. No not always in the way I wanted them answered but he showed me that even his "no" was the right answer, I just couldn't see it at the time. One last thing.....the amount of money that we had to bring to the bank when we sold our house was the exact amount that State Farm gave us to move. I will end with an AMEN!